Thursday, November 29, 2018

2018 Toys for Tots Fundraiser

It’s that time again! Actually it’s beyond that time of year but I’ve been incredibly busy with life changes and what not and haven’t remembered to post about it at a time I could actually do it. Definitely dropped the ball on getting this organized this year. I’ve already collected a few donations from people that have their lives more organized than I currently do (thank you!) and have a small pile of toys to start with, too. We’ve got about 2 weeks to get it all together and delivered instead of 6 to 8 because again I really dropped the ball this year.



As most of you all know by now, I got an idea to do a Holiday Fundraiser benefiting Toy for Tots back in 2009. I’ve done it ever year since then and it’s that time again this year. I really can’t believe it’s been this many years now but here we are.

A lot of people often say, "I just don't have time to do anything for charity even though I'd love to." Which is the truth for some people. Which is how I got the idea to do the holiday fundraiser. I will take all the money that gets donated and go buy as many toys for Toys for Tots as I can. I keep them all in bags and then go deliver them to the main Toys for Tots drop location in the area. That way, you can do some good but you don't have to really do anything aside from donate to the cause. For proof that I'm doing what I say I'll be doing with the donations, there will be pictures of the toys as I buy them and pictures of all those toys being loaded into the car and more upon being delivered to a Toys for Tots location.

I know some people see this and think about donating but think they only have $5 or $10 to spare and think that's not worth it. Well, that's not true because through the years I've received tons of $5 and $10 donations! Every little bit adds up to something bigger!

With $5 I can buy an action figure, toy cars, Legos, a stuffed animal, various kinds of dolls, PlayDoh sets and various other things. $5 will buy a toy and in some cases more than one toy. I can get 8 or 9 Hot Wheels cars on $10 so no amount would be too small. If 15 people donate 5 dollars, I have $75 and that will buy quite a few toys to brighten a child's day. You can do something to help and leave all the work up to me.

And yes, I know Christmas isn't about the toys and other presents but imagine being 7 and not looking forward to waking up Christmas morning because Santa couldn't bring you anything this year. It's a bummer.

To donate via paypal or Google Wallet, send whatever amount you want to amorousrocker [at] gmail [dot] com. There's also a paypal button at the top of the right sidebar. If you use Cash App, send to $SmashlyJo. 



2009 Pictures: HERE
2010 Pictures: HERE
20111 Pictures: HERE
2012 Pictures: HERE
2013 Pictures: HERE
2014 Pictures: HERE
2015 Pictures: HERE
2016 Pictures: HERE
2017 Pictures: HERE

I need to have the donation turned into the Toys for Tots warehouse by December 16th so they have plenty of time for sorting everything out and delivery. I’ll need all donations in by December 13th at the very latest. Let’s go! :)

Thursday, December 28, 2017

2017 Toys for Tots fundraiser Results

Here is the final Toys for Tots post for 2017! 

This year was my biggest year yet for the fundraiser! We raised just over $1,000 and got just over 200 toys! I LOVE doing this each year and am so happy I took the chance to see what would happen that first year back in 2009. It's a lot of work but it's so worth it and I couldn't do it on such a large scale without so many awesome people supporting my fundraiser by donating their hard earned dollars and also by promoting this on their own social media platforms. I appreciate everyone that helps me with this every year so much! I really wouldn't be able to buy this many toys without all of you helping out.

This years totals:


$1,035
212 toys


That averages out to under $5 per toy. I'm so serious every year when I say it only takes $5 to make a difference and help. 

Over the last 9 years, here's the total of toys I've purchased with the funds raised:

2009: 83 toys
2010: 103 toys
2011: 132 toys
2012: 146 toys
2013: 140 toys
2014: 95 toys
2015: 184 toys
2016: 161 toys

2017: 212 toys 

That's 1,256 kids that received a toy on Christmas morning thanks to everyone's generosity. 

If you want to see final results of the fundraiser from years passed, you can check all of those out here:

The final results from 2009: Here
The final results from 2010: Here
The final results from 2011: Here
The final results from 2012: Here
The final results from 2013: Here
The final results from 2014: Here

The final results from 2015: Here
The final results from 2016: Here

Ready for some 2017 pictures?









































If you want to see the full album then just *click here* to take a look at the Toys for Tots 2017 album.

I want to say thank you (again) to those of you that donated this year. Whether it was the first year you donated or the third or the ninth, thank you so much! Whether it was $5, $10, $25, $50 or more; it doesn't matter. I appreciate it and I know the families that benefit from Toys for Tots doing what they do appreciate it, too. I have so much fun being able to do this. I've donated to Toys for Tots since I was a little kid and my mom let us each buy a couple toys of our choosing to give to them and kept doing so for as long as I can remember. So blame her for getting me started into this one. ;) Doing it on such a large scale the last 9 years has been so awesome. I couldn't do it without all of your help so thank you!

Until next year!

XoXo

Friday, December 15, 2017

9th Annual Toys for Tots Fundraiser & 3rd TFTF Prize Giveaway!



As most of you all know by now, I got an idea to do a Holiday Fundraiser benefiting Toy for Tots back in 2009. I’ve done it ever year since then and it’s that time again this year. I really can’t believe it’s been this many years now but here we are.

A lot of people often say, "I just don't have time to do anything for charity even though I'd love to." Which is the truth for some people. Which is how I got the idea to do the holiday fundraiser. I will take all the money that gets donated and go buy as many toys for Toys for Tots as I can. I keep them all in bags and then go deliver them to the main Toys for Tots drop location in the area. That way, you can do some good but you don't have to really do anything aside from donate to the cause. For proof that I'm doing what I say I'll be doing with the donations, there will be pictures of the toys as I buy them and pictures of all those toys being loaded into the car and more upon being delivered to a Toys for Tots location.

I know some people see this and think about donating but think they only have $5 or $10 to spare and think that's not worth it. Well, that's not true because through the years I've received tons of $5 and $10 donations! Every little bit adds up to something bigger!

With $5 I can buy an action figure, toy cars, Legos, a stuffed animal, various kinds of dolls, PlayDoh sets and various other things. $5 will buy a toy and in some cases more than one toy. I can get 8 or 9 Hot Wheels cars on $10 so no amount would be too small. If 15 people donate 5 dollars, I have $75 and that will buy quite a few toys to brighten a child's day. You can do something to help and leave all the work up to me.

And yes, I know Christmas isn't about the toys and other presents but imagine being 7 and not looking forward to waking up Christmas morning because Santa couldn't bring you anything this year. It's a bummer.

To donate via paypal or Google Wallet, send whatever amount you want to amorousrocker [at] gmail [dot] com. There's also a paypal button at the top of the right sidebar.


Every little bit will help. If you don't have the ability to do paypal or google wallet but want to donate anyway, let me know and we'll work something out. A few people last year just gave cash or sent me a check since they didn't have a paypal or google wallet account and didn't want to create one either. Other people have sent me Amazon gift cards to buy toys that way and other people just purchased toys and dropped them off to me to add to the pile. I have Prime so free Amazon shipping and fast! Where there’s a will, there’s a way. ;)

I need to have the donation turned into the Toys for Tots warehouse by December 16th so they have plenty of time for sorting everything out and delivery. So we have around 5 weeks this year to get going! I’ll probably go shopping for toys on December 15th so I’ll need all PayPal donations and checks in to me by December 12th at the very latest. Then the 16th I’ll be taking everything out to the warehouse for delivery. Let’s go! :)

2009 Pictures: HERE
2010 Pictures: HERE
20111 Pictures: HERE
2012 Pictures: HERE
2013 Pictures: HERE
2014 Pictures: HERE
2015 Pictures: HERE
2016 Pictures: HERE
On to the Prize Giveaway Details!

This year, we’ll be doing like we did last year thanks to some amazing people and businesses donating some gift cards and items to me to use in a giveaway. The way you can donate will be the same done through sending money through PayPal or Google Wallet. The prize giveaway for those that donate will work the same as they did the last two years, too. As a refresher, everyone that donates will be entered into a contest to win a prize or prizes. For every $5 you donate to the holiday fundraiser, you get one entry into the contest to the drawing of your choice. So $5 gives you one entry into the drawing of your choice. $20 is 4 entries into the drawing(s) of your choice and so on and so forth. If you get multiple entries, you can either put them all towards one thing or split them up between multiple things.

Some of these gift cards are to local businesses so only people that live locally will benefit from trying to win them. And of course the physical items will be fine for anyone to try and win.

Drawing will be held after the fundraiser ends in mid-December and items will be shipped out to the winners in January.

Once you donate, I'll need to know which item you want to be put into contention for and you can do that by emailing me amorousrocker [at] gmail [dot] com. Or holler at me on the Twitter machine @AshlyStar and let me know which item (or items depending on the amount of entries you get) you want to be entered in for.

Give away prizes this year include:

$50 Hand and Stone Spa gift package (good for a 50 minute massage OR facial)

$20 LUSH gift card

$25 Game Stop gift card

$20 Amazon.com gift card

$20 Jamba Juice gift card

$20 Target gift card (2 available)

$20 Starbucks gift card (2 available)

$25 Sonic Drive-In Gift cards (5 up for grabs)

$20 Tiff’s Treats gift card

$20 Olive Garden gift card

$20 Chipotle gift card

1 Loose Leaf Tea Sample Box (pick flavor profiles you prefer and receive 4 sample size packs of loose leaf tea)

1 The Art of Shaving The Elements of the Perfect Shave Starter Kit ( Includes Pre-shave Oil, shaving cream, after shave balm and trial size shaving brush)

3 month Yummy Bazaar’s Destination Food Club subscription (sends authentic and delicious foods from around the globe, 6-8 sample size food items per box)

1 Soap and Glory Travel Size Trio (Travel size in Hand Food hand cream, Heel Genius foot cream & Sugar Crush body cream)

1 Soap and Glory Happy Pamper Set ( Clean On Me shower gel and The Righteous Butter Body Butter)

1 Handmade Soap Trio (you’ll pick 3 scents out of 12 available)

1 Bath Bomb Trio Mystery Pack (surprise surprise surprise! vegan and sensitive skin approved bath bombs)

6 sets of Cinemark movie passes (2 passes per set)

Some of these gift cards are to local businesses so only people that live locally will benefit from trying to win them. And of course the physical items will be fine for anyone to try and win.

I need to have the donation turned into the Toys for Tots warehouse by December 16th so they have plenty of time for sorting everything out and delivery. So we have around 5 weeks this year to get going! I’ll probably go shopping for toys on December 15th so I’ll need all PayPal donations and checks in to me by December 12th at the very latest. Then the 16th I’ll be taking everything out to the warehouse for delivery. Let’s go! :)

Saturday, April 15, 2017

8th Annual Toys for Tots Final Post

Here is the final Toys for Tots post for 2016! This might not look like a ton of toys but that's in part to my amazing placement skills. 

This year makes the 8th year in a row that I've done the TFT Fundraiser. I LOVE doing this each year and am so happy I took the chance to see what would happen that first year back in 2009. It's a lot of work but it's so worth it and I couldn't do it on such a large scale without so many awesome people supporting me through paypal, cash and toy donations. This year I was also able to round up some awesome prizes to give away to all the awesome people that donated something which made me even more happy. I appreciate you all so much. I really wouldn't be able to buy this many toys without all of you helping out. 

This years totals: 

$845
161 Toys

That averages out to about $5 per toy. I'm so serious every year when I say it only takes $5 to make a difference and help.

A few people have asked how the shopping part works and also about the items I buy so I'm going to explain a little bit. Skip this next two paragraphs if you're not interested in reading that. ;)

I plan it out so I can take advantage of sales and coupons so I can really maximize the amount of toys I get with the money raised. I actually do a lot of planning with this so I can stretch every dollar. Each shopping trip also takes me at least 90 minutes to get through so I can carefully look through everything and take advantage of any coupons, sales or deals I have available to me. This year, I waited until Target was doing a buy one get one 50% off sale that included brands like Barbie, Marvel and Disney. 

Another question a good number of people have asked about is why I include makeup, nail polish kits and items that look geared towards "older kids." That's because most TFT campaign sites are able to assist children up to the age of 12 and nail polish, make up, craft kits, model car kits and board games are things they request but tend to not get a lot of. Also, several local communities (mine included) offer extended support for ages 13-16. Most people tend to focus on younger children and the 10+ age range ends up being the group they need more things for because they don't get much donated for that age range. They do use their cash and online donations to help fill in the gaps wherever the needs are as well but I like to include a variety of everything.


If you want to see final results of the fundraiser from years passed, you can check all of those out here:

The final results from 2009: Here
The final results from 2010: Here
The final results from 2011: Here 
The final results from 2012: Here
The final results from 2013: Here
The final results from 2014: Here
The final results from 2015: Here

Ready for some 2016 pictures? Of course if we're Facebook friends, you may have already seen these since I uploaded them there the day I delivered the toys.

















To see the full set of photos from the 2016 fundraiser, check out my Flickr album.

As for the prize giveaway, most of the prizes were mailed out last week (or given out for the people I know IRL that won stuff) although there are still a few I need to get sent out (I promise, soon!) to people. !

XoXo

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Recipe: Limoncello Bread Pudding

A few days ago I decided I wanted to make a limoncello bread pudding. I'd been thinking about lemon-y dessert things I could do but didn't want a cake or a pie and that seemed a good idea as any. I love bread pudding and I love playing around with different flavors to do with them. I wanted to wait for a night I was actually going to cook dinner as well so I could have a nice dessert following something that wasn't Chipotle or Snappy Salads.

 So yesterday, after I got all of the food prepping for take to work lunches done for the week, I decided it was going to be a "spend a lot of time in the kitchen" kind of day. I checked over a recipe for spicy Sicilian chicken stew that had been passed along to me from a friend's mother and luckily, I had everything I needed to make it on hand. Which gave me the perfect excuse to make a (hopefully) kick ass dessert to follow up a delicious meal.


I haven't made a citrus flavored bread pudding but I LOVE lemon things. And lime things. Tart and sweet are my friends. The boyfriend also loves lemon and/or lime desserts so I figured this would be the perfect new thing to try out.

It did not suck. 

I posted a picture on my instagram account because what else are food pictures good for other than to take up space on the internet? Anyway, a few people asked if I'd share the recipe. I had already planned to put it up somewhere and this is a better place for a food post than The Book of Faces.

Limoncello Bread Pudding



Ingredients

Bread Pudding:

6 cups cubed challah bread (or whatever you prefer)
3 large eggs
2 cups half-and-half
1/2 cup limoncello
1 tbsp fresh lemon juice
3 tbsp granulated sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/4 tsp fine sea salt
1 tsp freshly grated lemon zest

Unsalted butter or cooking spray, for buttering the casserole dish

Topping:

1/2 cup powdered sugar
1 tbsp fresh lemon juice
2 tbsp limoncello
1 tsp freshly grated lemon zest

Whipped cream:

1 cup heavy whipping cream
2 tbsp granulated sugar

Directions:

Bread pudding: 

In a large bowl, whisk together eggs, half-and-half, limoncello, lemon juice, sugar, vanilla, salt and lemon zest.

Butter a 2-quart casserole dish and add the bread cubes to the dish. Pour the wet ingredients over the bread and let sit, refrigerated for 30 minutes.

Preheat the oven to 325 degrees F.

Cover the casserole dish with foil and bake for 25 minutes. After 25 minutes, uncover the dish and continue to bake 20 minutes or until the bread has puffed up and is nicely golden on top. Allow to set for a few minutes after removing from oven.

Sauce to top bread pudding: In a small sauce pan over low heat, whisk together powdered sugar, fresh lemon juice, limoncello and lemon zest until powdered sugar is dissolved and smooth. 

Whipped cream: Place a metal mixing bowl and metal whisk into the freezer for 10 to 15 minutes. 
Place the sugar into the chilled mixing bowl and add the whipping cream. Whisk just until the cream reaches stiff peaks. 


Once the bread pudding is ready to serve, cut out a piece and top with the glaze and whipped cream to your liking.

I like to put about a tablespoon of sauce on mine while the boyfriend ended up putting several tablespoons on top of his and about twice the amount of whipped cream as well. Either way it was delicious and I'm not sad that there was plenty left over.

Enjoy!

PS and totally unrelated: I'll have the final post and pictures up from the 2016 Toys for Tots fundraiser up here soon! If we're buds on The Book of Faces, the pictures are already up there for your viewing enjoyment. 

Wednesday, November 16, 2016

8th Annual Toys for Tots Holiday Fundraiser & 2nd Annual TFTF Prize Giveaway!

 As most of you all know by now, I got an idea to do a Holiday Fundraiser benefiting Toy for Tots back in 2009. I’ve done it ever year since then and it’s that time again this year. I really can’t believe it’s been this many years now but here we are.

This year, we’ll be doing like we did last year thanks to some amazing people and businesses donating some gift cards and items to me to use in a giveaway. The way you can donate will be the same with the addition of being able to send through Google Wallet instead of just paypal, the way I do the fundraiser in general will be the same & the prizes will work the same as they did last year, too. As a refresher, everyone that donates will be entered into a contest to win a prize or prizes. For every $5 you donate to the holiday fundraiser, you get one entry into the contest to the drawing of your choice. So $5 gives you one entry into the drawing of your choice. $20 is 4 entries into the drawing(s) of your choice and so on and so forth. If you get multiple entries, you can either put them all towards one thing or split them up between multiple things.


Give away prizes this year include:


$50 Hand and Stone Spa gift card

$50 Adrift Float Spa gift card

$20 LUSH gift card

$25 Game Stop Gift card

$20 Amazon.com gift card

$20 Target gift card

$20 Paciugo Gelato Caffee gift card

$20 Twisted Root gift card

$20 Starbucks gift card

$25 Sonic Drive-In gift cards (5 up for grabs)

OPI Breakfast at Tiffany’s 4 piece mini nail polish set

NYX Cosmetics Liquid Suede Lip Cream trio

ULTA Macaroon Bake Shop Bath Fizzers Gift Set

3 month Nerd Block subscription (choice of either Classic box or Arcade box)

The Small Gift Box by Lucky Scruff (Original Beard Oil, Original Mustache Wax and the Lucky Scruff Wooden Beard Comb)

6 sets of Cinemark movie passes (2 passes per set)

Handmade soy candles trio

Handmade soap set. Soap scents are Citrus Punch, Cinnamon Oatmeal and Spearmint.


Some of these gift cards are to local businesses so only people that live locally will benefit from trying to win them. And of course the physical items will be fine for anyone to try and win.

Drawing will be held after the fundraiser ends in mid-December and items will be shipped out to the winners in January.

Once you donate, I'll need to know which item you want to be put into contention for and you can do that by emailing me or holler at me on the Twitter machine @AshlyStar and then letting me know which item (or items depending on the amount of entries you get) you want to be entered in for.

A lot of people often say, "I just don't have time to do anything even though I'd love to." Which is the truth for some people. Which is how I got the idea to do the holiday fundraiser. I will take all the money that gets donated and go buy as many toys for Toys for Tots as I can. I keep them all in bags and then go deliver them to the main Toys for Tots drop location in the area. That way, you can do some good but you don't have to really do anything aside from donate to the cause. For proof that I'm doing what I say I'll be doing with the donations, there will be pictures of the toys as I buy them and pictures of all those toys being loaded into the car and more upon being delivered to a Toys for Tots location.

I know some people see this and think about donating but think they only have $5 or $10 to spare and think that's not worth it. Well, that's not true because through the years I've received tons of $5 and $10 donations! Every little bit adds up to something bigger!

With $5 I can buy an action figure, toy cars, Legos, a stuffed animal, various kinds of dolls, PlayDoh sets and various other things. $5 will buy a toy and in some cases more than one toy. I can get 8 or 9 Hot Wheels cars on $10 so no amount would be too small. If 15 people donate 5 dollars, I have $75 and that will buy quite a few toys to brighten a child's day. You can do something to help and leave all the work up to me.

And yes, I know Christmas isn't about the toys and other presents but imagine being 7 and not looking forward to waking up Christmas morning because Santa couldn't bring you anything this year. It's a bummer.

To donate via paypal or Google Wallet, send whatever amount you want to amorousrocker [at] gmail [dot] com.

Every little bit will help. If you don't have the ability to do paypal but want to donate anyway, let me know and we'll work something out. A few people last year just gave cash or sent me a check since they didn't have a paypal account and didn't want to create one either. Other people have sent me Amazon gift cards to buy toys that way and other people just purchased toys and dropped them off to me to add to the pile. Where there’s a will, there’s a way. ;)


I started buying toys this year in January.
Just 2 or 3 out of every check, so I have a nice
little stash going already.



If you want to see pictures from the last 6 years of holiday fundraisers, you can see the photo albums below:
2009 Pictures: HERE


2010 Pictures: HERE
2011 Pictures: HERE
2012 Pictures: HERE


2013 Pictures: HERE

2014 Pictures: HERE
2015 Pictures: HERE
I need to have the donation turned into the Toys for Tots warehouse by December 16th so they have plenty of time for sorting everything out and delivery. So we have around 5 weeks this year to get going! I’ll probably go shopping for toys on December 15th so I’ll need all PayPal donations and checks in to me by December 13th at the very latest. Then the 16th I’ll be taking everything out to the warehouse for delivery. Let’s go! :)

Thursday, October 27, 2016

Reaching out is hard.

Reaching out to people is hard for a lot of people to do. It's scary just to think of being that vulnerable with another person. It's scary to open up and let another person see raw emotions, especially when those raw emotions are pain and sadness or anything that's generally seen negatively. It's even harder to reach out when you're struggling with mental illness.

When suffering from anxiety and/or depression, I have no idea how many times I've typed out a text message when I needed someone around or needed someone to talk to only to end up never sending it.





Messages just like these.

I'd type them out and then I'd re-read them checking for spelling errors or autocorrect mistakes. Then that voice in the back of my mind would chime in.

"Why are you bothering them with your nonsense? They have enough going on without you adding more to it, you know."

"You know how stressed they are right now, why do you want to make it worse?"

"You know sitting there watching TV with someone won't fix anything so why pretend?"

"You know they have better things to do than come sit with you."

"You're just being dramatic."

"Why make them worry about you like that over nothing?"

"Do you really want them to see you like this?"

"Of course they're going to say they're not busy and can talk, they'd feel guilty otherwise."

"They have their own problems, what makes you think they have time to deal with yours, too?"

"What if they say no? Won't you just feel worse then? Why do that to yourself?"

"They're probably busy and don't have time to deal with you right now."

I could go on and on with 100 other ways I've talked myself out of reaching out to someone when I was struggling and needed help. That little voice was all too happy to always come up with a long list of reasons not to press send or to put the phone down and not make that call.

Then I always felt worse than I already did because now I'd convinced myself that I couldn't reach out to the people that care about me for whatever various reasons that little nagging voice decided to throw out. Which usually brought on feelings of hopelessness, loneliness and isolation.

I couldn't stand to be struggling through things alone but I couldn't bring myself to ask anyone to help me either. It was a painful cycle to go through and never failed to make things worse. I'd type out a message and then I'd talk myself out of sending it. I'd go to a person on my contacts list and stare at the little green phone that would make the call and then I'd talk myself out of it. Not because I didn't want to but I felt guilty for putting myself and my needs over the feelings and needs of the people in my life. I'd think about how they were doing and I'd decide I could wait, that I didn't need to put this, me, on their plate of concerns, too. Other times I'd look at how well things were going for them and couldn't be the one to bring their spirits down. I always worry about myself second. This is great for depression and/or anxiety because it makes it easy for the illness to convince you to keep things to yourself. 

I'd gather my courage up and prepare myself to reach out, to be vulnerable and then that nagging voice that tells you all those lies when you're struggling through depression or anxiety would beat me back down. I'd end up either feeling numb, like an empty shell and feeling so unbelievably broken. I'd sit there just staring off and wondering how I could be so dumb. Or I'd end up feeling too much, getting overwhelmed, and I'd wind up sobbing on the floor because even sitting up felt like it required too much energy. I'd cry until my eyes hurt, until I was shaking and sick at my stomach. Then regardless of either response, I'd be angry with myself for being so weak. I was weak for not being able to ignore the nagging little voice, for letting it talk me out of anything. I was weak for having no response, for feeling broken. I was weak for having such an emotional response, for curling up and crying until I couldn't cry anymore. I was weak for letting my mind get the best of me. I was weak for not being able to send a text or make a phone call. I was so angry at myself for not being able to do more and do better that I ended up feeling a lot of resentment and self-loathing.

None of that is reality. I am not weak now and I wasn't weak any time I was struggling with these things. It takes a great deal of strength to battle with mental illness every single day and keep doing it every single day. It beats you down, day after day. I wasn't weak and no one else is, either. It's hard battling an illness every day. It's hard battling an illness every other day or once a week or however often it happens. I was stronger than I ever realized or gave myself credit for and if you're struggling right now, so are you.

The people that care about you are never too busy to be there for you when you need them. Depression and/or anxiety will try to tell you they are but they're not. They're not too busy. You are not bothering them. Yes, they might be dealing with some stuff too but that doesn't invalidate what you're struggling with. Their good day won't be ruined because you needed someone to talk to or to be there for you. There is no "perfect" moment. There is no "better time." You are not a burden. You are not a hassle. You are not "another problem" or "more stress" for them to "deal with." You don't need to feel weak or guilty for needing help. You don't need to feel angry or loathsome because you can't do it on your own. You are not hopeless, broken or beyond helping. Don't listen to that nagging little voice in the back of your mind telling you how broken you are or how much you're a burden to those that care about you because that voice is lying and so unbelievably wrong.

You don't have to struggle alone. Even if you don't have anyone or don't feel comfortable reaching out to someone in your real life, there are so many online resources available for you to connect with someone. Therapy chats, apps like 7CupsofTea, groups, message boards, text message help/support and helplines you can call. Once you get passed the fear and uncertainty the first time, it's easier to ask for help and reach out when you need it. 

Please just know that you're not your illness, it doesn't define who you are. No matter what that little voice tries to tell you and no matter how loudly it tries to tell you it's lies, you are worthy, you are strong, you are capable and you are brave.