Words.

You can turn the same words over in your head a hundred times, repeating them like a mantra, hoping one more time will make them sink in. If you say them to yourself enough times, you'll adjust to them, accept their truth and begin digesting what they really mean.

But sometimes, it takes speaking those words out loud to make them glow bright and real.

Even though the biggest part of you understands the reality of the situations you find yourself in, there's always some part holding on to hope, holding on to the idea that it's not real. Maybe you're just having a nightmare that feels like it has gone on forever but then you'll wake up and order is restored and everything is alright again. Not perfect because life never is.

Words are rarely ever "just words" without meaning. They're representative of thoughts, feelings, emotions, memories and events. Even words said without thought aren't entirely without meaning.

No matter how many times you've said these words over to yourself, trying to force them to stick, sometimes it takes saying them to another person to make the realization sink in. To make it real. It takes hearing the noise leaving your lips for that blow to come followed by that wave of clarity that lets you know you're not just stuck in a nightmare.

Justifying your simple joys.

I’ll never understand people’s need to justify why they like the trivial things they like. I’m never ashamed or embarrassed by anything I find appealing or enjoyable because if it brings me joy and happiness, why should I care what anyone else thinks of it?

I don’t. And never will. And I guess it’s for that reason that I’ll never understand why people feel they need to explain why they like something and try to convince others of it’s coolness when they don’t agree. Everyone likes different things and some people you like aren’t going to necessarily be into the same things you are. If you feel you need to justify a song or a TV show or a food you like to someone, you’re probably too concerned with people’s opinions of you. And if liking a dorky TV show or an annoying song could jeopardize a friendship, you’re better off just letting that happen. If some one's opinion of you is changed in a negative way because of something you like, that's their problem. If they treat you differently because of it, then maybe they're not as nice as you thought.

Justifying things you like is silly. Almost as silly as the people who try to prove why their hobby, favorite sport, favorite song, etc is better than whatever it is someone else with a differing opinion likes. If it’s not hurting anyone and it makes you happy, enjoy it and stop worrying about what everyone else thinks.

Dallas Stars, family stuff & on I ramble...

My dad moved back from California. He got back to Texas yesterday, UHAUL hauling all his belongings (and some of mine, my mom's and my siblings belongings from YEARS AGO) and his truck. Now I can see him more than just a few days out of the year. He moved to California 8 years ago and I've had a couple of brief stints with living out there but never for very long. My other younger brother is now the only person in my family still living out there.

The Stars won in regulation against the Canucks. They won all three games on their Canadian road trip and they've had a hell of a run the last couple of weeks. They're first place in the Pacific Division and 3rd place in the Western Conference currently. I hope they keep this going. It's been far too long since I was last able to go to a Stars playoff game. ;)

I need to find someone new to go to Stars games with me. I usually just go with the boyfriend but there are times he has work and can't go. Then there are times like tomorrow where his work gets a suite for the game and he gets to go with them. And I can't go since I don't work for the awesome company that he works for and it's one of their "bonding/togetherness" things they're trying to work on doing more of to help the teamwork aspect come together more. The other 3 people who were my game buddies have all moved in various directions that are too far to take in Stars games anymore in the last few months. Although, I could just go to a game by myself once in a while. I might try that Thursday and see how that goes. I do plenty of other stuff by myself and don't give it a second thought, so why not this? We'll see.

I got my menu finished for that whole business thing I've got going on for me lately. Which is also why if you follow my Twitter or Tumblr, you may have noticed an increased amount of food pictures. And I don't even post pictures of everything I make! I'm not eating all of that or just making it for fun. It's a little side project now but it's growing into something more slowly and I'm getting excited about it the more work I get to do with it. I love baking and love being creative with things I make. And to be able to make some extra cash doing something I really enjoy is awesome. Of course, it will be more awesome once that goes from an extra cash thing to a full on income thing. Which is what I'm working toward. It's a lot of work but I'm quite determined. :)

This passed weekend, my youngest brother had hockey games on Saturday, Sunday and Monday night. His team won all three. Saturday they won 7-2, Sunday they shut out one of the best teams in their league 5-0 and Monday night they beat the best team in their league 4-2. They've been playing so well lately and it's great to see how much their confidence grows after each game. It's also cool seeing them all so happy after so many good games lately considering the horrible start they had to their season. I'm also proud of my brother for being so dedicated to his sport. I have so much fun watching him play and I enjoy seeing him do something that makes him happy. Also, I just really love hockey. Though watching him play does make me miss playing myself, haha.

In further boring news, I found a way that successfully gets rid of my hiccups. I always have to just let them run their course most of the time because nothing usually works for me. Which is annoying because for some reason, hiccups are really painful for me. I found that holding my nose and slowly drinking about 5 or 6 ounces of water without stopping or pausing does the trick. So you know, if you've never tried that and nothing else works, give it a shot. I don't understand why having involuntary esophageal contraction of the diaphragm is even a necessary thing people have to deal with. And yes, I did want to write about hiccups in part just so I could use the word "esophageal" because I like that word and rarely get to use it. So, there. I also wanted to share my hiccup trick in attempt to possibly be helpful, though. ;)

Boobs are awesome.

Some people's inability to be punctual to anything, ever, drives me fucking crazy. I HATE being late and always feel like an asshole when I do show up late to something without an actual good reason for it. I rarely show up anywhere late but that's beside the point. How hard is it to be a few minutes early or right on time? It's not. I get when it's something you can't control like a flat tire, having to stay late at work, really bad traffic, blah blah blah. But people who are just late all the time? KNOCK IT THE FUCK OFF. It's rude. And annoying.

Sometimes I like to throw random sentences in to see if people are paying attention. However, those statements are usually true. As true as someone's opinion can be, anyway. ;)

I've rambled on enough now. I feel like I cleared some real estate up which I'm sure won't last long before more thoughts and random junk move in to take up residence. I think way too much sometimes. Though writing does always help when I'm feeling anxious and can't sleep because my mind seems too full. If that makes sense. Anyway.... :)

Happy Wednesday!

Clearing out some monkey's from the attic...

• I hate the phrase "brain dump" for some reason. I'm not really sure what about it I don't like but I'm not a fan. Though, I don't really have a better snappy little phrase for it. Maybe I'll come up with one. Or not. A friend of mine's grandmother always has the oddest little phrases for things. Her phrase for a "brain dump" is "clearing out some monkey's from the attic." I've heard her use it many times but it still makes me laugh every time she says it or I think about it. It's not overly funny honestly. The way she says it is amusing. My friend asked her once what it meant or if she had any reasoning behind saying it. She replied, "Reasoning? Fuck if I know. You want a reason? Alright, I'm old and I say what I want and I think it sounds frogdamn cute. And if you had some monkeys in the attic, my guess is you would want those shit flinging bastards out of there. Thoughts taking up needless space in your mind are like those shit flinging monkeys, they got to go because if you leave 'em there unattended they're just going to stink the place up." That's not a typo, she says "frogdamn" and "frogdammit" quite often. :)
  

• Making a status update literally every 10 to 15 minutes about how much fun you're having at a party is pretty telling on the fun you're not really having. There's a story there but I'm not getting into all the details of it. I'll say someone I know is trying to make an ex jealous by posting 4 or 5 status updates an hour whenever she's out at a bar, event, with friends, at a party, etc talking about how fun it is, how many hot guys are hitting on her, etc. This has been going on for a little over a week now, every damn day. I don't even check Facebook regularly and it's driving me crazy. She asked me about it last night, my opinion on if I thought she looked stupid and obvious, and I answered honestly. Huge blowup ensued and it got ugly. Anyway. :)

• My dad is coming for a visit! He gets in town tonight and is leaving on Tuesday. I'm excited since I haven't seen him since September last year. One of the big reasons he's coming in to town is because my youngest brother is playing a hockey game at the American Airlines Center on Sunday. He's super excited. Hell, I'd be excited, too. He gets to dress in the same locker room as the Dallas Stars, walk their tunnel, set on the same bench they do and play a game on the ice in the building they play in. That's pretty badass. I'm happy dad will be here to see that and I'm excited for my brother, I know he's excited for it. :D

• I have occasional bouts with insomnia. Which I'm going through currently. It sucks. I literally can't sleep until I'm exhausted to the point of not being able to physically stay awake anymore and then I don't sleep for long and it's a restless sleep. I don't take sleep aids because honestly, none of the several I have tried worked for me. On the plus side of that, with nothing to do late at night, I've gotten a ridiculous amount of writing done for a project I'm working on. I was worried about making my deadline at first and now I'm close to done with almost 3 weeks left still.
  

• I like to look for the silver lining in everything. ;) I don't always find one but sometimes I do and that makes sucky things, well, suck less.
  

• I'm excited for the Stars game on Saturday. I got tickets to the game as one of Shane's (the boyfriend has a name!) Christmas presents. I also got him tickets to the Lightning game on the 20th as well as some DVDs. He's so easy to buy for. Hockey tickets are always an acceptable and very much loved gift and I always benefit from that one, too. I got an extra ticket to Saturday's game so he could bring someone else, too. He's bringing a co-worker who likes hockey but I don't think she's ever been to a game before. I'm so glad he picked her because we've hung out before and she's super cool. I always get excited when I meet a new girl I can actually get along with because I don't tend to get along with girls very often. The last game we went to was on New Years Eve (you know, that one where the Stars outplayed the Bruins and won 2-4? ;D) so it feels like it's been forever since the last game I was at. I do realize two weeks isn't forever or even that long at all but it feels like longer than it really is. :p

• One of my biggest pet peeves is not having consideration for others. I don’t think everyone needs to be prim and proper but most people need to get slapped with basic manners so hard that they never forget those basic manners, ever.

• Here recently, I've gotten quite a few messages on Tumblr about gay marriage and why I support it. I have a feeling it's probably the same person but since whomever it is poses their questions under "anonymous" I have no way of knowing. Since my last two responses (here and here), the messages have gone from questions to outright hate mail, basically. I had 12 messages waiting for me in my inbox yesterday when I logged in. I deleted them all because they were rude, hateful and I saw no reason to respond to any of the garbage in there. They weren't questions or even just disagreeing with me, they were just name calling and talking shit. I can accept that people don't agree with my opinions on things. I also accept that as someone who is open about beliefs and rather vocal about the things I support, I'm going to have to deal with trolls like this one. I just think it's stupid. I'm hoping ignoring them will make them move on. That usually works. Until then, I'll just keep deleting all the name calling and anti-gay bullshit they throw my way.

• People that do nice things for others "just because" without ulterior motives or expectations are awesome. People that do nice things for others "just because" only in hopes that they'll get something out of it presently or in the future fucking suck. People that do nice things for others "just because" but throw it in your face later on to try and use as a guilt trip or a manipulation tool really, really fucking suck. If you do that, you're an asshole.
  

• Also? I'm not overly rebellious or defiant for the sake of not being told what to do (though I'm not the biggest fan of people telling me what to do, lol) but when someone tries to guilt trip me into something, it pisses me off and makes me not want to do it that much more. Even if it's something I'm iffy on doing, guilt trip me and that's it, not happening.

Looking at my blog stats recently, on top of comments and emails from you guys, it's ridiculous how many people come here and read the stuff I type out into the blogosphere. Ridiculous in a good way, mind you. Thanks so much for reading and thanks for those that leave comments and/or send emails or respond to stuff via Twitter. Y'all are awesome. ;)

Happy Thursday!

Orgasms & Q-tips...

My friend April started a debate with a friend about how using a q-tip to relieve a really itchy ear was one of the best feelings in the world. Her and her friend were debating whether or not it surpassed an orgasm in terms of things that feel amazing. She ended up texting me for my thoughts on the subject which I happily supplied in heavy favor of orgasms over q-tips relieving an itch. I mean really, there's no contest, lol.

The question wound up on Twitter and no surprise most people went with orgasm over a q-tip relieving one's itchy ear. Honestly though, she's got a point with her q-tip defense. It feels fantastic when you have an itch inside your ear you can't get to and finally alleviate it with a q-tip. It's a wonderful feeling. It doesn't surpass an orgasm though, not even close. It did get me thinking of things that are simple but just feel great and possibly even surpass the awesomeness of a q-tip performing one of it's basic functions. So, I thought about simple joys that make me feel great and decided I'd put them up here. In no particular order..

-A shower after a hard workout, long day at work, sporting event, outdoor activity or anything that leaves you hot, sweaty and feeling rather filthy. Washing away all the grime and feeling clean, soft and warm? Fucking GREAT. That also works for when you're stressed and take a warm shower and feel lazy, warm and super relaxed afterward.

-Being outside in the cold and going inside, where it's nice and warm and then drinking and/or eating something warm. Especially coffee or a warm mug of tea (showing my bias) because both are so delicious. That feeling of heat warming your body from the inside out is awesome.

-Getting swept away in a really fantastic book. I know a lot of people don't enjoy books and reading the way I do but it's an experience for me. I get very involved with the characters, the storyline and pretty much every aspect of the book. It's like being in a different little world and it's one of my favorite feelings, ever.

-When you're in the car and have to pee but you're almost home or wherever you're going to and don't want to stop anywhere so you hold it for what seems like an eternity. When you finally get where you're going, rush in, and get to go, it's such a sweet, wonderful relief.

-Hugs. Especially when you're having a bad day.

None of that is better than the feeling you get from an orgasm but they all definitely top the q-tip for me. I'm sure there are more if I took more time to think about it but I'm really not bored enough to spend even more time distracting myself with the subject. At least for right now, haha. Though if any of you fine people have anything you want to add to my list (comments section yo!), feel free to do so. :)

Happy Tuesday!!!

Stuff to think about....

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“As time goes on, you’ll understand. What lasts, lasts; what doesn’t, doesn’t. Time solves most things. And what time can’t solve, you have to solve yourself” — Haruki Murakami

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“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.” — Frank Herbert

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“Shallow men believe in luck; strong men believe in cause and effect.” —Ralph Emerson

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“Ships in harbour are safe, but that’s not what ships are built for…” —John Shedd

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Happy Wednesday!

New Year's Resolutions...

I keep seeing posts about everyone's New Year's Resolutions so I thought I'd make a post about mine.

Ashly's 2012 New Year's Resolutions

1. 
   
2. 
   
3. 
   
4. 
   
5. 
   

As you can see, it's a pretty empty list. Entirely due to the fact that I don't make New Year's Resolutions. I never have and never will. The entire notion of it is silly to me. If you know on 12/31 or 01/01 what needs to be changed in your life, chances are you didn't just realize those were changes that needed to be made. I see no need to wait for a specific date to decide I need to do better at XYZ, quit a bad habit, set a goal for something, do this or do that. I'm regularly thinking and evaluating what I do in life and who I am, the way I act, the way I view things, the way I react to things, etc. That doesn't mean I obsess about this stuff all the time because I don't.

Why wait for a new year to change things, set new goals, to make your life and/or yourself a better person? There's no need to wait for a specific time to give thought to self-improvement and/or bettering your overall life.

"I think in terms of the day's resolutions, not the years'." -Henry Moore

Happy Tuesday!

Porn, omelets, sneezing & other stuff...

Random thoughts post time! But first.... Oh yes, that's right.....

There are only 4 DAYS LEFT to make a paypal donation to the Toys for Tots fundraiser. Yes, only FOUR more days of seeing me talk about it all over the place, I know. I get tired of saying it but it's for a great cause so I do what I do, even if it's annoying. I was hoping I'd reach a certain number but I don't think that will happen since I'm still about $70 away from the number I was hoping to reach. But that's fine! I've still done well so far and I really appreciate everyone that has made a donation, you're awesome. :D And.... it's ALMOST TOY SHOPPING TIME! I'm excited. My favorite part of this is actually delivering the toys to the Toys for Tots drop location. I get super excited the whole way there and feel really happy the whole way home.

Now... Onward with typing whatever comes to mind. :)

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One of my friend's and I had a really weird discussion about porn yesterday. It was weird because we were talking about going to the zoo and that turned into him remembering something he saw once in a porn that made him almost throw up. It was fairly disturbing. I asked if he'd found it online again and tricked his boyfriend into watching it yet. Kind of like Rick Rolling someone in a really disgusting, twisted way. That will make them wish they could bleach the thought of it from their mind. I didn't even see it and I wish he'd never told me because the mental image is... bleh. And no, I will not say what it is because I can't bring myself to type it out in fear of thinking about it again in detail might make me throw up the scrumptious omelet I just consumed.

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By the way, speaking of omelets.... If you say the word "omelet" 10 times fast, it sounds really weird and you start to sound a little Russian.

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I always get amused when I say the words joint, blunt, high, bowl, smoke and papers in a conversation that has nothing to do with drugs and someone starts snickering at the double meaning in the word. Way to give yourself away there. ;)

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I get really tired of people acting like it's the end of the world because I say I don't want children. There's enough kids in the world. And really, there doesn't need to be a miniature version of me running around. Also, and most importantly, I have absolutely no interest in being a mother or raising children. I'll never understand why that's such a hard concept. I get the explanation of why it's so hard to understand from a societal standpoint but come on. I'm happy that so many people are super happy to have children and love being parents. Cool for you but that's not for me. Depending on how you broach the subject, I'll either quickly explain or Snarky McSnarkerson will roar to life. Most people fall into the "insulting" category with how they approach the subject so I don't often end up explaining. No big deal honestly because I shouldn't have to explain. You don't often hear people asking other people why they want to have kids and then going off on tangents about the benefits of not having kids. It's not like I hate kids, I don't. I'm even really good with most kids. I just don't want any of my own, lol.

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Sneezing in the middle of a cough is a really weird feeling. It doesn't hurt, it just feels awkward.

Sneezing in the middle of brushing your teeth only hurts if the toothpaste goes into your nasal cavity and comes out your nose. Also, on top of being disgusting and unpleasant, it gets pretty damn messy. It goes EVERYWHERE.

Sneezing while gargling mouthwash is pretty unpleasant, too. That burns coming out of your nose. I also have the automatic reaction to try and vomit so I don't swallow a bunch of gargled mouthwash.

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Oh and last but not least; I have no clue on that aforementioned omelet theory. Though I wonder how many of you tried it after I said it. :D

Happy Monday!

Microwaves, hockey pants & other random stuff...

• I really dislike when people don't clear the remaining cook time off the microwave when they pull something out before the time is up. It doesn't piss me off but when I see it, I want to smack that person. All you have to do is push another button. Takes a second to do it, lazy ass.

• You know those stupid looking pants that have words like "slut", "juicy", "shake it", "princess", "bite me", etc written on the ass? Imagine if CCM or Easton started making hockey pants with that kind of crap on there. Now imagine NHL players wearing them. That would be horrible. And amusing. More awful than amusing, though. I couldn't take a guy with "SEXY" plastered across the ass of his hockey pants seriously. Especially if there's glitter.

• I love those lawsuit commercials that state, "If you or someone you love have died from...." Really? Okay then.

• I hate using public restrooms as a general rule but sometimes, there's no way around it. I do love that more and more restrooms in public have the bars on the bottom of the door so you can push it open with your foot or leg as opposed to touching it with your freshly cleaned hands. It's disgusting how many people walk out without washing their hands. Also, you can always tell the people who aren't going to wash their hands most of the time because they're the ones bolting out of the stall so quickly you'd think there's an evil flesh eating fire breathing monster about to come rolling out after them. Of course, that only happens in crappy movies.

• Trying to put a dry sports bra on an already sweaty body can get pretty tricky.

• Every time I hear about a gorilla or other primate escaping from a zoo or even getting out of their areas, I'm always certain that the revolution is about to start and get a little apprehensive about it. This irrational fear I've had for years is why I don't want to see Rise of the Planet of the Apes. My irrational fear being true on a movie screen for 2 hours is only going to convince my irrational mind even more that they're going to bust out and fuck our shit up one day.

• The directions on my face wash bottle are so helpful. The final step tells me to "rinse thoroughly only using water" which is a relief. I was contemplating rinsing with the mouthwash or getting some orange juice for the job. So glad they clarified water would work best.

• I'm also very pleased my deodorant package informs me not to orally ingest it. I might have gotten saliva confused for sweat and tried to glide some across my tongue if not for that helpful little tip.
  

• I don't think there's a song more overdone by cover bands than "Don't Stop Believin'" by Journey. Not even anything Bon Jovi has that one beat.

I think that's enough from my mind today. ;)

Happy Thursday!

Contemplating your ruminations, dear people....

Sometimes, when I've got nothing better to do, I peruse the brain dumpage that goes on at message board for posting your random thoughts and rants. A lot of the time, I agree with at least half of the rantings on there. And if not, I at least get some amusement out of them. Though some, I have more in depth reactions to. Here are just a few examples of my deep thoughts of these ruminations. Enjoy, haha. ;)

"The phrase, 'We need to talk' has the ability to strike fear into the heart of anyone."

Mostly, that's a true statement. If it's a person I have no emotional tie to, it's not likely going to alarm me hearing that. I never worry that I'm caught in some deception or a manipulation scheme gone wrong because I don't play silly games like that. When I hear that phrase from someone I actually care about, I start worrying because I just assume that something is wrong or something bad has happened. I start running through all the possible things that could be wrong, all of which pretty irrational and highly unlikely. The worst is when the phrased is said hours before the talk actually takes place. Though being honest is helpful because it eliminates having to worry about being caught in some deception. One less thing to worry over. ;) If it happens at work, I just wonder what I've done wrong now or what silly little thing am I about to get nit picked for today. Or if I'm in a bad mood that day, I might wonder if I'm about to become unemployed but that's only a lingering, mostly quiet little thought behind all the other ones.

"Sometimes I wish I could run over a pedestrian or hit the car in front of me, just to prove a point. "

So, proving a point with road rage and property damage? Makes sense. Seriously. How else are they going to learn? Being taught the proper ways, rules and laws to do things obviously doesn't work but having a reality check in the form of some road rage is sure to stun some sense in to people.*

"Going to the circus as an adult is a very different experience. As a child, you ask, "How did they do that?" And as an adult, you ask, "How the hell did they end up doing that?""

My thoughts are more along the lines of wondering just who thinks up some of the wicked stunts these people pull. And then wondering why anyone would want to risk their lives for a 5 minute set while hoping they enjoy their profession as much as they seem to. Followed up by me wondering why the hell I'm at the circus when I hate clowns and being in an enclosed space with supposedly tamed formerly wild animals. Though back to my point. I don't like that a lot of people look down on circus performers honestly. I don't like that anyone is looked down on because of their profession, judged by how they earn a living, but that's another rant all together. Here, I'm talking circus performers. I don't see why that's such a bad or weird gig to have. Especially if they enjoy what they're doing. How many of you can say you truly enjoy what you do? I look at the circus as being a little bit like performing arts. Sure, it's a bit more unusual than ballet or musical theater but, so what?


"I bet the worst time of a mans life is the eve of his daughters wedding day at about 11:30pm. "Welp... MY little girl is getting absolutely railed right now. Awesome.""

So traditionally from this standpoint, isn't the sex after the wedding and the reception? Not on the eve? I'm not religious and not a traditional old fashioned type so I'm unclear on this but I always thought it was after the wedding hoopla that the sex was to happen. That point aside, I'd hope no one's dad sits around thinking angrily about his daughter getting it on with her new husband after their wedding. That just seems a little odd to me. People know their kids have sex just like you know your parents have had sex before. I choose to acknowledge that fact but never think about nor ponder the event. Ever. That's just not something I want to think about. And not something I'd want either of my parents thinking about in regard to me.

"People say I'm a negative person. I'm not, I'm just consistent in being positive that bad things are going to happen."

You know those ironic tshirts with the clever little life anecdotes or sarcastic phrases on them? This should be one. I want to put this phrase on a coffee mug and set up shop outside of hipster coffee shops and bookstores and see how many I sell. People just love to make themselves seem positive when they're being negative because it doesn't seem as bad, so I'm sure I'm going to make a fortune with my new endeavor.

"I can't wait to be old so I can say, do and wear crazy things and it's considered cute not strange."

Or you could just stop caring so much about what people think. Dun dun dun. Seriously, people put way too much thought into what other people will think of them. You're never going to see most of the people you walk by daily again, who cares what they're going to think about you? And the people in your life that matter should accept you as you are. If they don't, well, they suck. Do what makes you happy and stop worrying about what everyone else is going to think.

"I realize that you have a laptop with a built in camera, but it doesn't mean that you have to take a million pictures with it and post them all."

I don't even have a thought to go with this other than, RIGHT ON. I just wanted this one to be part of this blog post. Spot on. Awesome. Love it. Kudos. In case you're some how not getting it, I AGREE WITH THAT STATEMENT 100%. Everything is expressed more urgently and seen as more important when you say it in caps lock, right? Why else would everyone feel a need to prove their point in such a fashion? ;)

Happy Tuesday!

*If you took me seriously there, go lay down, please. I do not support violence or property damage though I am a big supporter of sarcasm. ;)

Quotes; change & growth.

Alan Cohen:

"It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power."

Alice Walker:

“No person is your friend who demands your silence, or denies your right to grow.”

Anais Nin:

“We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. We grow partially. We are relative. We are mature in one realm, childish in another. The past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present. We are made up of layers, cells, constellations.”

“When we blindly adopt a religion, a political system, a literary dogma, we become automatons. We cease to grow.”

Andy Warhol:

“They say that time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself.”

Anne Frank:

“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.”

Eleanor Roosevelt:

“People grow through experience if they meet life honestly and courageously. This is how character is built.”

Epictetus:

“It is impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows.”

Franklin D. Roosevelt:

“When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.”

Margaret Mead:

“Never doubt that a small, group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.”

Pearl S. Buck:

"A good marriage is one which allows for change and growth in the individuals and in the way they express their love."

Ralph Waldo Emerson:

"Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered, you will never grow."

Stephen R. Covey:

"We can never really change someone; people must change themselves. But we can help. We can be a resource. We can nurture, encourage and support."

Thomas Hardy:

"Time changes everything except something within us which is always surprised by change."

Tryon Edwards:

"He that never changes his opinions, never corrects his mistakes, and will never be wiser on the morrow than he is today."

Woodrow Wilson:

"If you want to make enemies, try to change something."

William Shakespeare:

"We know what we are, but know not what we may be."

Oh my wow, a post on Sunday!

So I woke up today and was lounging around in bed, just stretching and waking up. I grabbed my phone and was playing around on it. Then I realized, fuck, it's almost my birthday. Seriously, my birthday is tomorrow. Where the hell did the weekend go? I still was thinking my birthday was several days away but yeah, definitely not. My sense of time is a little fucked lately. The days are going by too quickly because I'm so wrapped up inside everything going on in my head and trying to make some sense of things that I'm letting the days fly by. I need to step outside my head a little more. Those issues will get resolved eventually so no need to go missing out on things because I'm too busy camping in my brain, right? Right.

So for my birthday plans tomorrow. I miss Dallas, horribly. There are tons of things to do there, even on a Monday night. The area I'm staying in right now? There isn't much to do on weekends let alone on a Monday night. So, I'm going to dinner with family and my boyfriend. Then we're going to go bowling I think since that's an activity we can all find fun and amusement in. Even though I suck unless I'm tipsy or drunk. I'm not a good sober bowler. After that, just back to the house and maybe watching a movie I love or something. The 3 bars in the town I live in aren't open during the week and if they are, you wouldn't be able to tell from the looks of things. So for the first time in a LOT of years, I'm going to have an easy going birthday and not party. Though not by choice so no accusing me of getting older and more responsible and crazy shit like that. ;)

Now I need to stop all this typing and get ready to go to work. Woohoo. Then I have to work at 11 AM tomorrow. Bleh. I asked for a day time shift though as opposed to my regular night shift, so I could have the night off to enjoy my birthday.