Was it all too much or just not enough?

Normally, I would play the half naked picture show today. Like I said last week, I'm not going to play as often on my blog. I'll pretty much only play when I'm in the mood too though I still post pictures with regularity on my blog as it is. I did have pictures for today but I'm not in the mood to mess with it this week.

Instead, I'll post something a bit more private than a half naked shot of some body part. Get your mind out of the gutter. This is an excerpt from a short story I wrote and submitted to a contest. It's only a small portion of the story but I didn't want to post the full thing here.

"She's walking down a hallway. She's the only one there. There are small lights that cast a dim glow. Not enough to see much. Enough to see that there are no windows on either side. Enough to see the walls on both sides are smooth and black. Enough of a glow and a wide enough path so that she doesn't feel suffocated, claustrophobic, trapped. She walks slowly, cautiously. Not sure what to expect. Not sure where this dimly light path will take her. She notices she's barefoot and that her feet sink softly into the black plush carpet beneath her feet. She reaches a hand out as she walks, trailing fingers over the smooth dark walls. It feels like marble. What a strange place. An amused smile spreads across her lips and she walks on. There's no rush. She feels no immediate danger.

She lets her mind wander as she walks. Disappointing thoughts fill her head. She shakes her head, as if a physical attempt the shake the thoughts free would actually work. She laughs at herself. Silly girl. She shrugs and gives in, letting the thoughts flow freely. She wonders about the mistakes she's made recently. She knew they were the wrong decisions to make. She had a feeling deep inside her gut that told her before she went through that she was making a mistake. She ignored the instinct, taking the benefit of the doubt, hoping she could get something for nothing. She let another smile spread across her lips. Bitter and full or mirth at the same time. Funny how physical expressions were so full of emotion without even trying. If she couldn't laugh at her foolishness, she would hate herself for it. You didn't get anything of value without paying a price. It was silly to think otherwise. Absolutely preposterous really.

Her steps slowed as her thoughts turned from her actions to her emotions. At that, she tried to mentally slam the biggest steel door she could imagine stop to end the change of thought. Actions she could deal with thinking about. She could not change those, could not go back and do things differently. Regret wasn't something she wasted time with. Actions she could control. Emotions, she wasn't sure how to control all the time. Forcing them away she could handle. This time, it didn't work. Feelings of sadness, despair, isolation and defeat wrapped around her. She could see her life passing her by with each day of hollow existence. Tears welled in her eyes and she clenched her jaw tightly, willing the tears away. Fighting against them hoping to keep them from spilling down her cheeks. She lost. Tears streamed down her cheeks effortlessly and she let out a ragged breath she hadn't known she had been holding in. She let the wall inside her crumble to nothing and let the emotion flood through her like a dam bursting. The sudden surge of emotion took her over from the inside out and she found herself sitting on the floor, back against the smooth wall. She buried her head into her hands. No one was there to see or her hear yet she still felt shame, felt a need to hide. She couldn't bear the thought that she was letting herself lose control this way. You can't really hide from yourself. You can try but it's a silly notion, a waste of time to try. Tears continued rolling warmly down her cheeks. The ache she felt from inside didn't subside any. If anything, it only worsened. Deepened, stretching inside, trying to take up as much space as it could.

She felt weak and vulnerable. Vile and ugly. Defeated and worthless. She was disgusted with herself, her lack of control. Her resolve to give in and give up so quickly. She couldn't begin to understand all the emotions she felt building inside her. She tried to grasp on to a coherent thought from all the words racing through her mind. She could not make anything out. It was all a mess. Just words spoken with no sense or reason. She began sobbing and lost what little control she had left."

Happy Thursday.

She's my cherry pie...

I want to see Public Enemies. Johnny Depp and Christian Bale in a movie about fucking John Dillinger? Hell yes. I have such a hard on thing for 1930's gangster goings on. I always find the bad guys so intriguing apparently. Sometimes sick and appalling but I always find myself wondering why they did what they did. Why they do what they do. My fascination with serial killers, mob crime and all kinds of things of that nature really just stems from a want to dissect and understand what compels a person to do such things. Anyway, that's another topic for another day. I really hope the movie doesn't suck. At least if it does suck, I have Depp and Bale to feast my eyes on. ;)

Oh and Tim Burton doing Alice in Wonderland? That should be interesting. I really, really dig Tim Burton. Of course, y'all know that already. Unless you're new to the blog. Then you didn't know that but you do now, lol.

I really want to read "The Razor's Edge" by W. Somerset Maugham again. I haven't read that one in quite a while and feel like reading it. Only problem being I can't find my copy of the book. I think it's probably in a box in storage somewhere or it's one of the casualties of moving that has gotten lost. In which case I'll have to track down a new copy of the book.

I got tagged by the lovely and entertaining Lil Bit with that 8 Things tag y'all possibly seen floating around. I don't resist the tags. I'm a sucker for them apparently. Though I haven't been tagged for anything in quite a while actually, lol.


8 things I'm looking forward to:

1. Seeing my boyfriend in May.
2. Seeing OPETH live!
3. The new Incubus CD.
4. A Saturday night off work, lol.
5. Summer.
6. X-Men Origins: Wolverine
7. Fruit stands opening up soon so I can get yummy fresh fruit.
8. Getting a new laptop.


8 things I did yesterday:

1. Helped a friend through a dilemma.
2. Paid the cell phone bill.
3. Made another friend laugh so hard he had juice come out of his nose. Ooops!
4. Sang and danced.
5. WORKED.
6. Kicked some ass at Rock, Paper, Scissors.
7. Cut my finger open slightly with a box cutter.
8. Had some rum.


8 things I wish I could do:

1. Leave.
2. Travel to London, Paris, Ireland and many other places.
3. Own my own business.
4. Win a lot of money.
5. Learn to surf.
6. See the Northern Lights.
7. Be less critical of myself. No matter how hard I try to, I don't get better at this.
8. Eat grapefruit! (I'm allergic.)


8 TV shows I watch:

1. NHL Channel/Hockey... it can count as a "show" dammit, lol.
2. House.
3. Family Guy.
4. The First 48.
5. Mythbusters.
6. Deadliest Catch.
7. All kinds of stuff on Discovery Health.
8. Stuff on the History Channel.

I'm supposed to tag 8 people to do this but I've seen it on so many blogs. So if you decide to do this, leave a comment so I can come check your answers out. ;)

Happy Tuesday!

You're a mountain that I'd like to climb...

I am not the kind of girl who cries much at all. I used to wonder about if something might be wrong with me. I would see things, read things and watch things that others saw, read and watched and they would cry. Happy tears, sad tears. I used to just feel a twinge of something and then feel nothing. I wondered about what might be wrong. I don't wonder about that any more.

Books don't make me cry. I have a couple friends, male and female, who read some books and they just tear up over things in them. Some books fictional, some book non-fictional. I read fiction. I read biographies. I read things both made up and real. I read some horrible things. None of it makes me cry though. I feel anger more often than not when I read of injustice and violence. I read heartbreaking stories and I'll feel sadness but I don't cry. The sadness never lasts long. It always turns to anger, to outrage at injustice.

Blogs sometimes come close to making me spill tears but still, it rarely ever happens. Something can be written with such raw emotion and I may feel like I want to cry, my eyes may water as I relate and understand the pain the person is going through but those tears go away without anything ever spilling over. I don't often try to keep them from spilling over. They just don't. Retreating as quickly if not quicker than they appeared.

Movies don't make me cry. Not even the saddest one or one that has such a deliriously happy ending you have tears of joy pooling in your eyes.

Those TV shows with the gut wrenching episodes that people warn you you'll need a box of tissues for? Even those sports moments, where the players themselves are brought to tears, do nothing for me. I can feel sad, feel sorry, feel this and feel that.

It takes a lot for me to cry though. I've been told before that I'm cold hearted. That I have a black hurt. That I'm this that and the other thing blah blah blah. That's not true at all. I have a big heart and I care a lot more than I tend to let on about things. I don't cry because, I just don't. I feel a lot of things. For one, I think crying is a very private thing. I don't like to have people see me crying. I don't cry in front of people. I don't even have to think about it or fight not to do it because it isn't something I often think about doing. I deal with things in my own way. It may outwardly seem like I'm cold but I'm not. I just don't wear those emotions on my sleeve or anywhere near there.

Music though, it's one of the three things that are the exception to that rule for me. Music can bring me to tears. Tears of sorrow for lyrics that are so mournful for love and life lost. Tears of pain for all the hurt and heartache that gets poured out in so many words and syllables. Tears of joy for songs so bouncing and happy that you just have to laugh and smile because listening to the song makes you so deliriously happy you just have to react in some positive way. Tears of outrage and anger for songs that make me want to scream and smash things. Tears of appreciation because the composed music is so damn beautiful that it makes me ache in such a raw way on the inside. Music makes me feel down to my soul. There aren't a lot of things in the world that make me feel blissfully alive but music is one thing that does. No matter the kind of mood I'm in, I have something I can listen to that can ease me, bring me up, relax me, calm me and on and on. Music is my drug, my addiction, my passion.

I love Incubus. They are one of my favorite bands and have been for such a long time. I always love their music. I have all of their albums. Combine all the songs from each album and there are less than 10 songs by the band that I don't like total. Their lyrics always speak to me in some way.

Their newest is a song called "Black Heart Inertia" and I can't stop listening to it. This song makes me simultaneously feel some conflicting emotions. Sadness and sorrow matched with a deep, aching feeling of happiness, contentment and the urge to squeal happily like a little girl on Christmas morning. I know why those lyrics make me feel that way too but that part, I'll be keeping to myself. =)

Happy Monday!

You spin my head right round...

Brought to you by: Amorous Rocker

Do you remember what you were like a year ago?
Yeah. I liked her better in some ways but not in the ways that are important to me.


Who was the last person you cried in front of?
Myself. I don't cry in front of people. Boyfriend being the exception and I don't like to cry in front of him.


Do you watch wrestling?
Nope.


Have you ever played Twister?
Yes, it can be fun sometimes. ;)


What are four of your favorite comfort foods?
Fried chicken, macaroni & cheese, mozzarella sticks, ice cream.


Have you ever seen your best friend cry?
Some yes, some no. I think if I saw one in particular cry, I really wouldn't know what to do, lol.


How do you know the last female you got a text message from?
We met at a job & she's an amazing person.


Do you remember the first time you kissed the last person you kissed?
Actually yeah, I do. =) It was a good kiss. A very good kiss. I knew he was something special from that one kiss.


Look behind you, what do you see?
The kitchen and all the stuff in it.


Would you eat five spoonfuls of super hot salsa for $1,000?
Probably. I love super hot salsa. =D


Does it annoy you when the windows on the car you're in are dirty?
Ehh... it depends on how dirty they are. If they're only slightly dirty, I can deal but I like clean windows. =D


Do you find yourself funny?
Lol. I amuse the fuck out of myself. If you ever see me just chuckling to myself, don't worry because I'm not that crazy, I'm just that damn funny.


Could you go for a chicken sandwich and some waffle fries?
Oooh from Chick-Fil-A? Fuckin' yeah, mmmm.


What was the first cigarette you ever smoked?
I was like 13... I have no idea what kind it was actually. I don't remember.


Do you like going to the dentist?
Hell yeah, free candy! Wait, no.


Are you sarcastic?
Just a little. *wink*


When was your last one night stand?
Years ago.


Do you ever make shadow puppets with your hands?
Lol. Sometimes when I really can't sleep. Of course, there has to be some kind of light in the room too. I like sleeping with it being super dark.


If you were kicked out of the place you're currently living, where would you go first?
Probably one of the bars down the street if they were open. If they're not open, then the restaurant closest that has a bar. I'll need a comfy seat, some air conditioning and a drink while I figure out the best plan of action. ;)


Do you have a fear of taking tests when you are not prepared?
Hmmm.... no, not really. It might make me anxious but I wouldn't be scared.


Can you sleep without sheets or blankets covering you?
If I'm tired enough and the room temperature is comfortable, yes I can.


If you could change your eye color to anything what would it be?
Black with red pupils! Or crimson red with black pupils. Or a really pretty purple. Maybe burnt orange? Maybe they would be yellow with the black Batman logo in place of my pupils. So many options to choose from... lol.


Could you last an hour awake without talking?
Yeah. I talk a lot but I don't need to be constantly talking. I hate mindless small talk most of the time.


What color is the last thing you drank out of?
A water bottle with a light blue tint.


Have you ever burped in front of your significant other or the opposite sex?
Like... all the time, lol. I'm still a lot of tomboy honestly, ha. Most guys are grossly amazed that I can burp louder than they can. It's a talent, I swear. Boyfriend still trips out about it sometimes but he doesn't mind.


Do you hate it when people text back with one word?
No. Unless I asked something that requires more than a single word answer. In that case, yes I do hate that.


Do you miss being a little kid?
Not really. I do miss being carefree sometimes but I wouldn't want to re-live childhood, lol.

Happy Saturday!

You shook me all night long...

When I opened up the mailing box and pulled out the Hungry Bear Vibrator, my first thought was, "Oh hi!" Then a pleasant smile settled onto my lips and I opened it up. When I get a toy from a website, I always like to examine it as soon as I get it. The first thing that caught my eye was the clitoral stimulator. It's shaped as a bear holding a fish in it's mouth. I thought it looked a little strange and was a bit worried about it. I moved on in checking out the goods and the next thing I noticed was on the underside of the head, there was a woman's face imprinted there. That kind of creeped me out a little, no clue why but I figured whatever, maybe it's texture helps some how or something.

I love bigger toys. I don't mind smaller ones, they can be fun too but I'm partially to something a little thicker. I don't care about length beyond it being a good average length. I know some girls want something super long but me? I'm about the thickness honey and this one did not disappoint. =)


I put in batteries and got familiar with the controls. The controls aren't labeled but there are only two dials so it shouldn't be hard to figure out. I slid the dial on the left first and found that it set the shaft to moving in circular motion. That was interesting. I've never had a toy that moved in a circular motion and never actually thought about one that worked like that. I toyed with it to see how fast the circular motion would get to and then slid the dial back up to turn it off. The right side controlled the vibrating part.

I was anxious to try it out but I needed some lube. I wasn't using this thing without some lube. After a trip to the store, I was ready to rock.

I lubed it up, got into a comfortable position and started thinking sexy thoughts as I started to work the toy in. I didn't even have it on yet and I was enjoying it. It's got a thick, firm shaft made from vinyl with little ripples for a little added sensation. It felt so good. From what I could tell, the creepy woman's face didn't help anything but with the toy inside, you can't see it and I soon forgot it existed.

I decided to try the rotating feature out first, by itself. That was definitely interesting. It hit some really delicious spots and a few times, I momentarily forgot to do more than just hold the toy in place and let it do it's thing. I played with the sliding dial, starting out on a lower setting. I moved it down quickly playing with the speed settings. It starts getting a bit loud when you have it on high but it's no bad. The circular motion just feels... sexy. It feels a little like having the inside of your vagina and your G-spot massaged which was nice and arousing. It didn't get me off though.

Next, I turned the rotation off and went for the vibrating. I like a good, strong vibration. This was definitely good for that! I started out with it on low and slowly worked the toy in and out of me. I moved the vibrations down to somewhere in the middle and leaned back. Now I could really feel the tickler working too and OH MY GOSH. I was apprehensive about that at first. I mean come on, it's a bear holding a fish in it's mouth, lol. I'm perfectly fine with that now. This toy has a fairly strong vibration and the thick tickler really moves with it. A lot of ticklers annoy me because they just buzz there enough to be felt but not do much. This one vibrates into a frenzy and feels wonderful. I cranked it up to the maximum vibe speed. The shaft and the tickler had me racing my way to an orgasm and it didn't take long for me to get there. A few minutes and then I was biting my lip to keep from screaming out.

I had to take a break and go to my real job. I realized I hadn't used the toy with rotation and vibration at the same time yet. I had meant to but I got so carried away with the vibration and that damn tickler, I forgot I needed to try out the two features at once. So after work, I tried it out again. More lube. This time with no apprehension, only a smile on my face and happy memories of my earlier orgasm.

With both features going at once, it's noticeably more noisy. If I lived alone, I wouldn't care how noisy it is but I don't so I don't need people walking by and hearing odd noises. I did try masking it with some background noise and that seemed to help cover up some of the noise.

Also with both features on at the same time, it's a little distracting and also gets a bit irritating finding a speed combination that works. Both of them on low and it's not enough going on. Both of them in the middle and it just feels irritating. Both of them on high and it feels like a bit too much is going on but not in a good way. Sometimes a lot going on can end in an explosive orgasm but that wasn't the case here. I played around with setting the speed of each feature evenly and and then differently. The only way I liked both going was to have the vibration on high and the circular motion on low. It's a bit of an interesting contrast with the two at once though and I like it. The rotation feels sexy, erotic even. Then there's the good vibrations and the tickler buzzing away. I'll just need to play around more with the speed settings and hopefully find something that really rocks it for me.

It's a really good toy and I enjoyed it quite a bit. I'd give it a 7.5 on a scale of 0 to 10 and would definitely recommend it to someone looking for a good, thick (but not so thick you'll be in pain) toy with a rockin' clitoral stimulator. I definitely like it and will enjoy playing with it more. Thank you Tabu Toys!

To give you a really good idea of how the toy works, here's a video. =) If you're hoping to see something pornographic, you're out of look. It's just a simple little demonstration of how the functions work. Plus, you get to hear my annoying voice explaining simple junk. Fun!

That does it. =)
Questions & comments encouraged. ;)

Happy Friday!

I'll end this all before it gets me...

FYI: Don't be a snotty bitch to the people who serve you your food and drinks. I get that a lot of people look down on people in the service industry. Food service being one of them. People also look down on their garbage men, house cleaners, street sweepers, plumbers and other people who provide a daily service. Take away those service workers and what happens then? You have to cook your own damn meals all the time. You have to figure out what to do with your own garbage. You have to go out of your way to get your recyclables where they belong. You better figure out how you make your toilet stop over flowing while you're at it before your bathroom floods with toilet water. Those people provide a service. It's not the most glamorous job and it's likely not the one they thought they would end up with. It's hard work and it makes a paycheck. It also doesn't mean the person doing it is lazy, stupid or without motivation to do better. To me, doing a crummy job is better than those who sit and don't work. Those who sit and draw money from else where. Don't look down on all people in the service industry. Sure there are the ones doing it to coast by because they don't care to do better. So what? If it doesn't personally hurt you, let them be. You're not better than them just because they're serving you food, fixing your drinks, picking up your trash, fixing your toilets and so on. Be appreciative when it's deserved and drop that snotty, superior attitude please and thank you.

*Ahem* =)

I have a new toy review that I plan to start working on very. It's only my second review but it shouldn't be too hard. I haven't got to use the toy yet but I shall have a chance soon to bust it out. I'm excited about this one too. It looks... interesting. You'll have to wait for the review to find out what it is though. ;)

I can't find my digital camera. I just had it last night too. That's annoying.

I can't find the book I was reading either. Also very annoying. It's the 4th in a series by Rob Thurman and I was only about 100 pages (or there about) in to this one. Now it's gone missing and that's unfortunate because it's damn good. I have no clue where it went. I do know it didn't sprout a pair of legs and go wander off though. It pisses me off when my stuff just kind of "disappears" from where I've had it sitting for several days. I would accuse Boyfriend of snatching it since I got him hooked on the series. Except he's 2,000 miles away so he's innocent. This time. *grin*

So... I fucking love Seether. Many of my post titles are lyrics from various songs of theirs. I know I've posted about my adoration for Shaun Morgan, posted their videos and yapped about them and their music on here several times before. I have to say it again, they're one of my favorite bands and have been for several years. When I saw them with Nickelback, I was surprised at the lack of interest the overall crowd had in Seether. Then I wasn't so surprised. Nickelback and Seether are both rock but they're not exactly the same type of rock. I can see how people who really dig Nickelback wouldn't be into Seether as much. I like Seether way better. When it came to buying a shirt, the tour tee I got was a Seether tee. I could only afford to get one for myself and it was easy to decide what band I was going for, lol. I've seen Seether twice live now. The thing about them is that Shaun has a wonderful voice. He sounds the same if not better live than he does when you hear the music off their album. He lacks stage presence though which I think is why a lot of folks at the Nickelback show weren't so into them. They don't do flashy lights and big pyrotechnics. Not yet anyway. They basically get up their, play their music, slightly interact with the crowd and do a couple nifty things with lights. The thing about me? I'll take a band with talent who sings their music with passion over a flashy stage show any day. It's great when a band (like Nickelback) can put on a good stage show and be able to sing their music without looking like robotics. I'm not losing interest in a band just because they don't woo the crowd with their wit and fireworks though. I read on a message board some people at the show were disappointed in Seether because all they did was come out and sing their music essentially. Why is that a bad thing? Anyone care to explain that to me? I don't understand it. I don't understand it because the stage show isn't what's important to me. I'm there for the music. You wanna put on a flashy show, that's cool too, I can dig that and enjoy it too. Nickelback's pyrotechnics were bad ass and Chad Kroeger's charming little persona was amusing too but if they stripped that all away, I'd probably still enjoy the show as long as he still sang well and they still played well.

Anyway, this song is off Seether's most recent album. It's one of my favorite songs by them overall. I might have even posted it already but I didn't want to go back through my music posts and see if I had posted it or not, lol.

Happy Monday!

Saturday!

Brought to you by: Amorous Rocker

What are your favorite color gummy bears?
I don't eat gummy bears.


What is the sexiest part of the opposite sex's body?
Eyes, lips, shoulders, arms, jaw line.


Have you ever made up/sang a song for someone you cared about?
I make up silly little songs for people and sing them in a silly manor. =)


Ever had a song sang about/for you?
Yes, a couple actually and meh to that.


Is there a baby in the room with you right now?
Nope!


Do you know how to dance?
Yes, yes I do. The music moves me.


Where do you sing the most, in the car, the shower or other?
Car & shower. Grocery store when I'm shopping alone, lol. Also anywhere else I feel like.


What is your favorite thing that is green?
Money. =) I don't own anything green. Unless you count my Dallas Stars stuff but that's usually black with just a little green.


What did your last text message say?
Don't know, not checking.


Boxers, briefs or boxer briefs?
On a guy, I like boxer briefs. For me? I like what I like. ;)


What do you smell like?
Like Tahitian Renewal body was and raspberry body lotion.


What's in your pocket?
No pockets but it would probably be my cell, my lighter and some Nivea for my lips if I were wearing pants with pockets.


Anything in your mouth?
Teeth, tongue, gums, other flesh, saliva. The usual.


Ever hurt yourself playing Wii?
Yeah I have before but since I don't own one I rarely ever get to play. Sadness.


Do you have freckles?
Barely.


What's the last movie you saw in the theater?
Fast & Furious. Boyfriend took me. I watch those movies for the cars. The acting and story lines always blow.


Ever jumped/fallen/been pushed in a pool with your clothes on?
Yes, no, yes.


Are you wearing any clothes that you wore yesterday?
Negative.


What did you last put on your face?
ProActiv moisturizer.


What's the last thing you watched on TV?
A preview for "The Soloist"


What's the last video game you played?
Super Mario 64 on my DS.


Can you do the alphabet in sign language?
Part of it. I'm teaching myself. =)


Do you have an uncle named Joe?
Nope. Not that I know of anyway, lol. Maybe a distant one somewhere along the way perhaps.


Do you wear glasses?
No need. =)


Do you like your feet?
I HATE feet. They're ugly little things. Or big things in my case, lol.


Do you sleep well at night?
Not really. Depends.


Would you ever get a tattoo with some one's name on it?
Not likely.


Would you ever get your nipples pierced?
Been there, done that.


What is your LEAST favorite type of alcohol?
GIN.


Did you ever have tea parties when you were younger?
Lol, nope. Not my thing. I played with hot wheels, Legos and sports stuff.


What would you do if you saw a guy hit a girl?
Kick him in the face and be like, "Asshole, how do you like it?!" Actually it would depend. I would probably find security or a cop somewhere and have them get on it.


What is the coolest restaurant you've ever been to?
The Magic Time Machine is fucking cool. =)


What do you do with clothes you've outgrown or don't want anymore?
I donate them. Unless they're too torn up then I trash them.


Where do you go when you want to get a REALLY good sub sandwich?
The kitchen.


What is the lowest grade you ever received on a report card?
Probably a B. My grades were mostly A's, always. =D


Do you support local music/artists?
Fuck yeah! If they're decent and not a bunch of fuckasses.


What style of house would you like to live in?
A Gothy castle. ;)


Would you ever go a week without showering?
FUCK NO.


If your nails are painted, what color are they?
Black.


Do you flip the channel when commercials come on?
Nope.


Are there any really gross dishes in your bedroom?
Eww, no.


When was the last time you got the chills?
Earlier in the work. I was cold.


What would you do if your parents caught you drinking?
Nothing. I'm 23. Actually, if they caught me drinking... I'd ask them why they were running around barhopping, lol.


Have you seen any of the Saw movies?
Yeah. They're lame.


Do you watch any cartoons?
Sometimes I do.


Have you ever lost a house or car key that you never found?
Negative.

Happy Saturday!

Wings of lead...

I got back in Wednesday evening. I had two really shitty flights.Thankfully the first only lasted two and a half hours and the second was only an two hours and ten minutes. The second from Arizona to California was forty-five minutes late leaving. All total bullshit and disorganization. The flight from Dallas to Arizona was overbooked and also late leaving. I had an hour and a half lay over in Arizona and I ended up with twenty minutes to spare because of the flight from Dallas being late. Well, turns out I had loads of time to spare in actuality since the flight leaving Arizona ended up being so damn late. I had plenty of time to spare because it took so long to board. Twenty minutes after we were scheduled to be in the air we were still boarding and then dealing with other issues. Meh. People are stupid. I hate flying. I won't mention the airline I went with this time but I don't think I'll be choosing them again. On the way out just over a week ago, I had issues with my flights out as well. I'm not a picky person at all. I just want to sit in my seat, listen to my iPod, read a book, sleep and be left alone. Be on time or close to it and not have to deal with a bunch of bullshit. So not too much to ask.

Tuesday night I went out with Boyfriend to one of my favorite spots around Dallas. Slim and Sparrow and The Car Couple met us up there. I got so drunk. I order double rum and cokes. The bartender/manager/one of the coolest guys ever makes them awesome. They equal out 4 to 5 shots of rum with a splash of coke on the top when he makes them for me. I had 4 of those plus a Kamikaze shot. I wasn't falling down drunk or I can't see straight drunk. Just "I'm having a fucking great night" drunk. I even won a game of pool even though I wasn't doing so hot when I was sober, lol. I play better intoxicated though. ;)

I'm not going to write a long detailed summary of my trip that lasted a little more than a week. I had fun. I hung out with friends. I spent time with family. I spent time with Boyfriend and his family. I went out and had fun. I saw a badass concert. I met a couple new people and mostly that wasn't so fun, lo. I had some annoyances. I wanted to punch some people. I laughed a lot. I had sex a lot. I didn't sleep much. I was happy as fuck the entire time I was there. =)

Oh and... I don't give a fuck that the Obama's got a fucking dog. Seriously. Shut up already. Thanks. *grin*

Now for some questions just because I can.

1.) What item are you too embarrassed to buy?
There's pretty much nothing I'm too embarrassed to buy. I had a friend who had a 'roid problem once and was too embarrassed to go get some medication for it so I went in and got it for him. I have no issues buying condoms, lube, tampons, underwear, feminine cleansing products or anything else. I've no shame about things life throws my way and the products I need to tend them. I won't buy condoms for other people though. If you're not mature enough to get your own condoms you don't need to be fucking. Just my opinion.


2.) Between you and your significant other, who controls the television remote?
He does. I hardly watch TV. When I do, it's sports or House and he'll be likely watching them with me anyway.


3.) Would you rather go to the museum or the zoo?
Oh man! What kind of museum? That's a hard decision for me. I love going to the zoo and seeing the animals. Especially if there are penguins and a good aquarium going on. I love museums too, especially art museums.

Oh and... a Happy Birthday to you Os! Go say hey and wish him well will ya? ;)

Happy Thursday y'all!!!!!

I do both Jay and Jane...

Remember the first sex toy review I did recently? To spare you from having to scan it again if you don't want to, I said I thought it would be more fun personally for me to use it with someone instead of just solo use. I know myself very well in terms of what I like and don't like in bed, this includes playing around with toys. I was so right. On a scale of 1 to 10, for solo use personally I give it a 5.5 maybe a 6. For use with a partner where my partner is in control of the toy while using it on me, I live it a 9. Boyfriend loved using it and I wasn't complaining one bit at all. Fun times indeed. =)

I had a 9 hour visit with my grandparents. It was great. We just ate and chatted. No TV or anything like that. We did wrap some things up and I took a few pictures. Mostly we just sat around chattering on. I was surprised, happily so, at how much my grandpa had to say. He wasn't in such a hot mood when we got there but as the afternoon turned to evening, he perked up a bit and got a little more chatty. It was a really nice visit. I didn't even realize we had been there that long because it didn't seem like it was that long.

The Seether/Nickelback concert was Saturday. It was awesome. I've seen both Nickelback and Seether before so I knew it would be good. Though Seether touring with Nickelback makes me scratch my head. They're both rock but not the same. Most everyone there was there for Nickelback and didn't receive Seether very well. I adore the fuck out of Seether and their lead singer Shaun Morgan. I was dancing, swooning and singing along during every song they went through. Even though most everyone else was just standing around not doing much. Oh well. I started raining right when Seether went on and pretty much rained all through their set. I was worried they might call the show since it was in an amphitheater and there was a little thunder and lightning. They didn't call it and things went on. Woohoo. Then Nickelback came on and everyone was going crazy. Chad Kroeger has such good stage presence. He talks and interacts with the crowd a good bit and has a really good stage personality. He's pretty funny too. They just put on an all around good show really. I got a badass Seether t-shirt and picked up a t-shirt for YB too per my mama's request. It was a fun night.

Other random bits...

I suck at pool the first few games. Then I get back into it and do much better. Even when I haven't played in 5 months, lol.

Sports bars with shitty service sucks. Gotta love the HUGE screens presented for all your delightful sports watching needs, good drinks and tasty food. Bad service over and over seriously kills it for me though and then I just won't go to that place again for a while.

Strippers with good attitudes rock. Strippers that are pretentious, snobby, conceited bitches don't rock and should realize their shitty, superior attitude is why they're getting ignored. Strippers in corsets with amazing black and red lace up corset style knee high boots are pretty swell too.

Black Cherry Mojitos are still damn delicious. I couldn't remember how well I liked them since it's been like a year since I had one but mmm, yummy.

Drunk drivers piss me off so bad. I have a personal issue aside from all the no-brainer reasons the rest of the world should have. Who thinks they should get behind a wheel and work a vehicle when they can't walk straight or find themselves giggle because their beer has foam?Ignorant scum.

I wonder if Bob the Enzyte guy gets recognized out in public and wonder about what someone whom recognizes him might say to him.

Happy Tuesday!

Come on sweet thing...

Brought to you by: Amorous Rocker

Who was the last male you talked to?
Boyfriend.


Do you plan on moving within the next year?
Sure do.


Do you remember your dreams?
Mostly yes.


Have you been to a baby shower?
Yeah. I didn't really have much fun at any of them but oh well, they weren't about me. =)


What color is your hair brush?
The mini one is black. The large one is purple.


Do you watch the Super Bowl?
I'm usually working when it's on.


Do you sleep with a teddy bear?
A penguin actually.


What movie do you think everyone should watch?
Crash.


What is your middle name?
A pretty one.


Do you have your future children's names picked out?
No. I don't want any children so there are no names to pick out.


How many cars can fit in your driveway?
Two. 


Are you taller than your mom?
Yes.


Do any of your close friends have kids?
Yes, several of them do and they all have ridiculously cute kids.


Do you know anyone who is pregnant right now?
Yes! One of my best friends is pregnant right now. And I have a couple acquintances who are pregnant too. And a co-worker and a friends girlfriend. My my my.

What brand are your favorite jeans you own?
Lucky Brand.


What is the closest red object to you?
My cell.

What is your favorite video game?
Mario, Rock Band, Guitar Hero, Devil May Cry, Final Fantasy, Left 4 Dead.


Do you play games on your cell phone?
Yuh! I just purchased Frogger Evolution. Fun! 


Do you have an iPod or Mp3 player?
iPod. It's burnt orange and awesome.


Who was the last person in your bedroom?
My bedroom is the living room so everyone is in there, lol. ;)


Do you lose your keys often?
Not often but it happens. My wallet is the thing I have issues keeping track of, lol.


Do you sing in the shower?
Oh yes.

Do you always wear your seatbelt in the car?
I believe I do. =)

How do I feel this good sober...

Ckearly I skipped HNT today. I didn't intend on playing while on my trip. I probably won't play next week either. Which is nice honestly. I'm having such a great time. =)

Last night we went to some friends house to watch the 2 hour demolition derby MythBusters and then just hung out a while. I LOVE MythBusters. It's one of the shows I like to try to watch. I love a lot of the shows that come on Discovery though. I'll take those over sitcoms, dramas and reality shows any day. ;)

Then we went to one of mt favorite places where I effing adore the bartender/manager. He's so cool. When I get a rum and coke, it's a glass of rum with a small splash of coke. Yum. I do hate shooting pool after not having done it for.... 5 months. Eek! I sucked. I wasn't trying very hard either but it was damn fun. Then we left there around 1 AM.

Went to Boyfriend's. Had amazing sex that left me feeling dazed. Then we watched "Yes Man" because we had rented it earlier from the snazzy RedBox. Boyfriend had now been introduced to the wonders of RedBox. ;) "Yes Man" was interesting, funny too, kinda weird as well. Not bad though.

Now I'm writing this quick little thing while Boyfriend's cat tries to eat my foot. He's not succeeding. Then we're heading to my aunt's house to visit for the day/evening. Should be fun. Then Friday will be fun. Saturday we go to see Nickelback and SEETHER! Mmmm I love me some Shawn Morgan y'all. I do have a Saturday Survey already set to post as well. Someone actually emailed and asked if I'd have one this week or not, lol. Awww. Thank you faithful SS person. *grin*

That's enough for me. I need to get moving in the general direction that has me leaving for the almost two hour drive to my aunts.

Have a great night/day/whatever time you're reading this! ;)

Welcome to the show...

This is my first sex toy review. I have purchased and used many toys of different varieties before so I'm not a stranger to using them by any means. I was excited to receive the Elite 7X Sensual Obsession Vibrator. I was also nervous because in exploring the toy, I was also taking mental notes so I would be able to write the review. Then I worried, "Oh my gosh, what if my review sucks?" Well, I'm not worried about that much now. It's one of those things that to me is subjective and I'm sure some will dig it and some will think they could have written it better. Such is life. It's my first one and I honestly haven't read more than 15 toy reviews before. In writing this, I felt a little blind but I did the best I could. I do have one request though. If you want to offer any tips, pointers or CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM then please, EMAIL ME (amorousrocker[at]gmail[dot]com) your words of wisdom. Onward....




The Elite 7X Sensual Obsession is a dual bulbous probe that is 5.5 inches in length. Generally, I like something longer and definitely wider than the super slim design but I wanted to give it a try anyway. Smaller sex toys can be just as fun as the larger ones, right? ;) The probe has a removable plug-in power jack that plugs into the power panel. One of the features is it's One Touch Activation with a button that also handily Glows in the dark. Just the press of a button and you're all ready to go. The glow in the dark button does glow. I switched out all the lights in the room just to make sure. It's fairly dim but you'll be able to see it if you're trying to. I had no trouble finding the button without even looking at it but I suppose the glowing button will come in handy for some.

It comes with a sleeve made of hygienically superior Silicone that has multiple little nubbies of goodness all over plus a clitoral tickler. The silicone sleeve is stretchy and I was really happy with how easy the sleeve was to get on to the probe. Some toys with sleeves are a pain in the ass (not in the fun way) because getting the sleeve on and off is like an annoying, frustrating chore all in itself. With this toy, the sleeve is easy to get on and easy to pull back off as well which for me is a plus.



It has seven different vibration settings starting from low, medium and high. Then comes surging, pulsating, escalating and super speed. I'm the kind of girl that likes a good strong vibration. I lubed up the toy and slid it in, starting on low. You know how some toys on their low settings are just an annoying buzz that barely registers as a vibration? This was a little better than that but not much. I got bored of that quickly and moved on to medium. Which still was better but I definitely needed more. I pressed the button again and it bumped up to high. That was better and I left it there for a few minutes. I was really enjoying myself and decided to calm down a little and try out the other settings. I had a feeling I wasn't going to like the surging vibrations and I was right. I haven't ever found a surging vibration I like because I don't like the second or two where nothing is happening at all. If I'm using a vibrating toy, I like to have constant vibration. I tried it out for about a minute and then moved on to the pulsating vibes. I would have enjoyed that more if the pulsating vibes were stronger ones but they're only so so and I got bored on that setting relatively quickly. I moved on to escalating. I like things with an escalating vibration setting. I do like constant vibration but I really like when there's a change in the vibrations even if it is only slight. I like the way it starts out slight and then builds up with the vibrations on that setting. It goes from a meek little vibe to a good strong one then starts over again. I used that setting for a bit and started building myself up for the orgasm. Once I had myself close, I pressed the button and went to the final setting, super speed. Going from escalating to "super speed" was a nice little jolt but I suspected their "super speed" wasn't much different than the high setting. I finished, cleaned up and then got busy writing this.

While writing, I got curious around here about the difference (if there was any) in the "super speed" and "high" settings. So I, wanting to give the best account possible, made the sacrifice to go back and play with the toy a little bit more. See? The things I do to give a good account. ;) I slid the sleeve back on, lubed it up and started on high. I used it a few minutes on high. Then pulled it out so the head touched only my outer lips while I switched it to "super speed" and then slid it back in. I was right, I couldn't tell much of a difference at all. Which was a little disappointing but not very much so since it's still got a good vibration to it.

I really liked the sensations of the vibrations coupled with the nubbies of goodness. I liked the nubbies on the sleeve because I love feeling texture as I play. A smooth, hard surface isn't bad but I really prefer some kind of texture so using the probe without the sleeve for vaginal play didn't really rock me too hard. With the sleeve on, I definitely enjoyed it. I will admit I didn't care much at all for the clitoral tickler. It was more annoying than anything else and didn't do much of anything at all for me. It's just kind of there and I honestly didn't remember it was even there unless it was on the highest setting. I did pull the toy out and use the head of it on and against my clitoris, playing with different vibrations against it. That was definitely more fun than the little tickler itself was.

All in all it's a pretty cool toy but I probably won't use it much for solo fun. I think it will be more fun to use with a partner and I'll be testing that theory later this week when I get to see Boyfriend again. Laying there, leaving the remote in my partner's hands, letting them work the toy on me as they see fit and changing the vibrations whenever they want to. Mmm fun. Thank you to TabuToys for letting me try this neat little toy out.

Send in your skeletons, sing as their bones go marching in again...

Brought to you by: Amorous Rocker
How old will you turn in 2010?
25.


Have you ever been called a bad influence?
Oh yeah. Mostly it was wrongfully so but whatever. =)


What's the connection between you and the last person to text you?
He's my closest friend and knows me better than almost anyone.


Have you been disappointed by anyone in the last week?
Only myself.


When was the last time someone of the opposite sex that isn't related to you gave you a hug?
Last night at work.


When is the last time you spoke to your boss?
Yesterday.


Do you have any framed photographs hanging on the walls?
No, not right now.


Have you had sex in the last 48 hours?
Fuck. No. Sad story eh?


Have you showered with anyone in the last 48 hours?
Nope again.


Would you like to put yesterday on repeat and live it forever?
No way. All I did was work. Then again, the work thing pretty much is on repeat every day. ;)


What kind of licorice do you like?
None. Ewww.


Do you like salt water taffy?
I don't remember. I haven't had that stuff in years. I think I liked it.


Have you ever tried committing suicide?
Thought about it. I never tried.


Are you jealous of anyone at the moment?
Negative. I'm not a jealous bitch.


Are you cynical?
Yes, lol.


Do you believe there is a great purpose in life?
To die. No, lol. I think it has purpose if you want it to have purpose. Life is only what you make of it.


Would you ever date someone who was completely different from you?
Sometimes opposites attract so why not? I'm fine with what I have though. =)


Have you ever liked someone that was in a relationship?
Yeah.


Have illegal drugs ever entered your bloodstream?
Oh yeah, many times over and over again once upon a time. I'm amazed I'm still as intelligent as I am.


Have you ever licked a photo?
Why would I do that? Is it flavored? Maybe a cherry flavored picture? That would still be odd, lol.

Happy Saturday!!!

That's when I made my great escape....

Everyone has things they are self conscious about. Me? I'm self conscious about several things.

Things that lots of other people are self conscious about as well. My big butt. My big hips. My big boobs. Though, I've become less self conscious about my boobs and more accepting of them. Partly because of just learning to be comfortable in my skin, part of it because of other things and another smaller part that I will attribute to playing HNT.

My broad shoulders. I've always had broad shoulders for a girl. I suppose it makes sense. I need something to help support those giant boobs right? It's always made me feel like a shorter Amazon woman though.

My big feet. I wear a size 10 and often have trouble finding shoes I like in my size. For some reason, apparently, girls with big feet only like to wear ugly shoes. Go figure. Not. When it comes to my Vans and DC's, I often just buy guys shoes because I can find things I like in my size.

My ears. To me, I have big ears. I also think they look strange. I'm not sure why honestly. I just like to pick myself apart. I've always felt awkward and self conscious about my ears though. Which is why I almost never tuck my hair behind my ears or wear my hair pulled back. I do love my cartilage piercing though. It's probably my favorite piercing despite that it bled the most when I got it done in the piercing parlor. I love it but people that don't know me often don't even know the piercing exists. I feel rather silly admitting that I'm self conscious about my ears but oh well. ;)

I love MySpace. I don't care how many people talk bad about it or how many people find it annoying. I've moved a LOT in my short life. I'm 23 and have moved more than 20 times. A lot of those I was moving around the same area but still, I didn't live in towns so small that people on the other side of town knew half of everyone on the other side of town. So it was always new people. I've made a lot of friends in my home state of Texas and more friends in California. I have friends who have gone away to college and then ended up moving and staying there because they liked the area better. Friends who have joined the military and moved across the US and some even to different countries. I have friends who have moves overseas. Friends who moved here and there. MySpace provides a fun and convenient way for all of us to stay in touch with friends as well as family. As well as allow me a little more access to the lives of bloggers I've become internet friends with. I know a lot of people hate social networking websites because they say they're only good for causing drama and other trouble. I actually did a post on that theory here so y'all know how I feel about that. I disagree and don't believe that the social networking websites are the cause of the drama. If you missed it or need a reminder, click the link to open it in a new window and check out the post. So here's a screen shot of a group of shots off my MySpace pictures. Of course, I covered some up with others that are in my MySpace photo albums. I'm not plastering my boyfriend's face on my blog. He wouldn't appreciate it so I won't do that. Don't forget to click for a non-MySpace shot. ;)

Happy Thursday y'all!!!!!

Break me down if it makes you feel right...

I think... I have nothing much to say today. My head is pounding and my mind just... aches. I've had too much going on in my head lately and nothing to do with it but let it swirl and twirl around in there. Taking up space when there isn't a lot of free room in there right now anyway. Crashing into each other, some thoughts becoming mingled with others as new thoughts are spawned, forming from one into another. I need an off switch. Instead, I busied my mind with looking over sex toy reviews and working on my own for the toy I have to review. I got it partly done and will work on it more today.

If I see another "I'm Pregnant!" or "I'm going to be a daddy!" bulletin on Myspace, cell phone text, email or blog post today, I might shriek. Of course, I won't shriek and I'm betting I'll see it done at least 10 more times before the day has ended. ;) I think that's one of the most over done April Fool's jokes ever. I admit, I used it one time. Only one time though. The one time I used it, it shocked the hell out of everyone, bwa ha ha. I really hope no one I know ever honestly tries to tell me they have a little life on the way on this day because I won't ever believe them, lol. Well, I would believe them if they stuck to it long enough but initially, I wouldn't. I don't hate April Fool's Day at all. It doesn't annoy me but I'm not gullible enough to ever fall for anything. Plus, I'm always alert and waiting for something. ;)

Normally I would be playing Wednesday Weirdness today but I'm passing this week. The questions are fine, I just don't feel like doing a meme. Besides, I did one yesterday. ;)

My Dallas Stars played the LA Kings last night. We won, in regulation, thank you very much. Morrison scored two of our three goals. He was trying hard for a third goal to get himself a hat trick but no dice. It's all good, we still won the game ending our losing streak. We played pretty well given the number of players we're down because of injuries. It's been a rather heartbreaking season. I imagine if we had not had such bad luck with injuries this season, we would have fared better. As it is now, we have 10 major players not playing due to injury. Our defense is now one badass player, a couple rookies and the rest AHL players brought up to take the spots of our fallen regular defense men. Lets not talk about what our offense is missing either. It sucks but oh well. I don't even care to make it to the playoffs now. I just hope we finish the season without any other player getting injured. We have a long enough list of players not playing because they're fucked up. Though it is giving some AHL guys a chance to step up and shine. Also giving some of the other guys on the team a chance to play a bit more too since most of the injured are key players who take a lot of ice time due to their being amazing at their skill. *Sigh*





Now a song. I'm sure lot of you won't like this but I know some will enjoy it because they share my adoration of this band. The band is Epica. I love them and have for years. I love her voice. I love their sound. Their music is often so relaxing but so meaningful. Plus, she's gorgeous. This is one of my favorite songs by them and I love the video of the session. It's not perfect but it's wonderful. *happy sigh*

Happy Wednesday!